In the middle of the sixth meeting Joachim was having before lunch, Chief Counsel Sammer - all five feet and eleven inches of him - barged in, the door slamming behind him with a loud bang. He was also, conspicuously yet to the surprise of no one, carrying a large baseball bat.

"I. WILL. KILL. PEOPLE. TODAY. With this very baseball bat! Has this administration lost the little that's left of what passes for integrity nowadays? I can't possibly work like this!"

Jogi pinched his nose and briefly considered, in lieu of attempting anything resembling a cordial, coherent response, just banging his head repeatedly against the dozens of binders currently piling up on his desk. But then he remembered that Oliver, his deputy chief of staff and he who eats PR disasters for breakfast in their incipiency, was on the Hill having budget negotations (again) with the Speaker at this very moment, so he finished what's left of his second coffee of the day in one gulp and thought better of it.

"Can I help you with anything, Matthias?"

"Kevin Kuranyi testified before the House Government Oversight Committee that the White House can't produce the Cruyff Memo, because the White House does not have the Cruyff Memo!"

"Well, do we?"

"HOLDING! IT! RIGHT! IN! MY! HANDS!"

Another stack of files got dropped on his desk, on top of the messy pile already residing there.

 "Joachim, you've got to rein this in - White House staff can't deposit their testimony on my desk at ten, and go talk out of their asses before Congress at eleven! Are you all just aching to get held in contempt?"

Juergen was right to ditch this dysfunction big family of an administration in favor of his old media consulting job back in California, he has to give him that.

"Hold your horses for now - I'll make some calls first. Meanwhile, get your deputy ready, we're sending him to the Hill to explain the situation once I got a handle on this. I need another expresso before lunch, and you, Mathias,  need to lose that baseball bat - what, Mario?"

"Jogi, you've got Senator Beckenbauer on line one -" his young aide shot the chief counsel a concerned quick glance, but continued, "he said he's calling about a portion of the testimony we gave the House Oversight Committee earlier this morning..."

"Oh Lord have mercy on our souls."